decoy story

[grunt_doc]

Slow day in the Emergency Room (good thing!).  Just a little goof off humor...I think so anyway. 

7 or more hen decoys and ONE jake decoy....might work out like this.......
 
Spring Turkey Decoy Strategy: A Narrative
 
Hey man, what's shakin'?  The name's Tom, Tom D. Gobbler.  My friends call me Neckbone, good to meet you.  So check this out....last week I was out cruzin' around, showin' off for the ladies.  Ya know, the regular stuff.  I come up over this hill and I see like 9 of the hottest chicks I've ever seen, man, I'm tellin' ya, they were beautiful!  Then I notice that this one small greaser punk standing there with this stupid look on his face like I'm NOT going to take away all his women.  Can you believe it?  I know!  So I strut my stuff up to him.  The ladies must have been in shock at just how awesome I am because none of them even moved.  I got right up in his stupid face and said to him...look friend, this is the way things are going to go down....I'm going to walk away and take these lovely ladies with me.  There's no way that I am going to let you, a scrawny little poser with a funny looking baby beard and one leg, out class me in front of this much tail.  I mean, look at me...I'm magnificent!  Do you see this tail fan?!?!?!?  Did you hear that gobble?!?!?  It's ridiculous.  He just stared at me with this complete blank look on his face.  I thought he might start crying, so I leveled with him.  OK, kid, I said to him, you can have that old nag behind the tree that won't shut her trap.  I can't tell what she looks like, but she must be ugly if she's hiding back there.  Man she wouldn't shut up!  The other chicks didn't even say a word, which is the way I like 'em.  They were obviously impressed with me.  This old broad, though...yak yak yak yak..  I think the kid got mad and must have sucker punched me.  Next thing I know, I'm out like a light.  Then I wake up here.  What's that all about?  This is a funny roost, though.  I've never seen a tree as flat as this before.  How the heck did that deer get up here anyway?  He must be embarrassed...he won't even look this way.  He just keeps staring off into nowhere.....

[mark hay]

Thats a classic,G-DOC,,, My wife told me she read it earlier and couldn't make sense of it . After supper she pulled it up and calls me in to read it for myself. Talk about strange looks, she was giving me ALL of them as I tried to read it aloud and LOL at the same time .Finally I realize why she doesn't get ,,,SHE DON'T HUNT!!!!  So I explained things as we went along and she gave a pretty good chuckle. I should have read it before supper , after 2 plates the laughter has my ribs hurting.  Thats good stuff!!!!     ''oldschoolturkeytactics''         OH, so was supper.

[hoosierhunter]

Sempre Fi Doc, this ole Marine really appreciates that tall tale. Thats just doggone funny, I don't cars who ya rrrrrr. I would like to see that in the T&TH magazine, yes I would.
 
 
                                                                   GOOD LUCK, GOD BLESS, AND STAY SAFE!
                                                                                     L.K.LESLIE 

[grunt_doc]

I'm not sure it's PRINTABLE good...but thanks anyway.  was just trying to kill some time, since I haven't been killing any turkeys so far this fall.

[trkyklr]

 humorous it is & yeah i feel ya on the not killin any birds yet they have been kickin my a%$ so far also

[mark hay]

Evenin' gents,    Don't misunderstand me please. SMILE BOYS , you've been hunting turkeys. All I've done is put up treestands , shoot a few squirrels, catch a few bass, cut several truck loads of firewood, scout and miss one song dog at 300 plus yards. Today it's in the mid-60s and raining on and off. Would love to have been out there getting my feet wet trying to outwit an ol' longbeard.                    ''ostt''

[trkyklr]

dont get me wrong mr hay the fun is in the hunt NOT the kill

[Gobblerman]

Hey, G-Doc, thanks for the great post....very clever and entertaining...and well written!  I wouldn't be surprised if it shows up in print somewhere.  Hope you have more slow days to give us more!
Jim

[grunt_doc]

ORIGINAL: Gobblerman

 Hope you have more slow days to give us more!
Jim

 
what a horrible thing to say.....[;)]
 
I'll see what sparks the typing fits...I'm open to suggestions

[mark hay]

TRYKLR, I was just pokin' at you all , with envy on my part . From reading your posts and replies , I can see you are a true hunter, among many.